Dont read this its a waste of time.

Enough is enough.

im never speaking to anyone in e house ever again.

sometimes i juz wish ill nv live past this year. I noe that sounds stupid but i find myself happy about that thought...and im pretty shocked at that too. I wish i was nv born..den ill stop gettin all these nonsense in all areas of my life cos ill prolly not hav em in e first place. These tears are awfully distracting...

I cant live pass that anymore... Cant live past what happened 2 years back.. all that trauma.. i cant take it if it happens again... they'll disown me this time.. I know itll happen again... I wont do well... cos it alwayz happens. Happens too often till im pretty numbed alr. Look at what happened to CTs. I studied reli hard for it and thought i was prepared but I read e qn wrongly for Econs. And i noe im gg to fail for GP cos i wrote a crapped up essay. And my chem... I didnt have time. I don wish to get my grades cos i noe il be screwed further...and im alr so screwed to the point tht i reli cant take it anymore... those watching eyes of theirs. Like she said..they've never trusted me.

I come home and it alwayz feels like a prison. and sometimes i juz dread going home id rather study in e lib with a close friend. Those watching eyes of theirs...and their spy. There is juz no warmth evrytime i step home. I dont like those quarrels... i get insomia all e time...i cant sleep at night bcos im so troubled.. u think i like being rude but i dont.. i hate being rude to em.. but i juz couldnt take it anymore...Perhaps sis is more open about her stress and stuff and openly talk to em about it but i talk about my probs in my diary. Biased.

and all the other nonsense... i cant even pin point to what they are... but i dun understand why ive been this depressed for a very long time and it hasnt reli gone off...I reli cant pin point it out at all. Its all an acumulative effect.

I'll be fine really... Dont worry about me... i can handle this.. ill be ok reli. Thank u for ur concerns and stuff... I guess evryone has their moments. Ill be ok. =) i will reli. It will go off sooner or later.