blahs

ACJC funo rama was..well..'erm'-y

As in..if someone were to ask me how it was...id say..'erm'. SO it was erm-y

and apart from that..it got me a major headache all day. Cos' of the hordes of pple..and all that thinkin abt what to eat for lunch cos the stuff were like tres tres tres tres superbly superbly superbly expensive.

A tiny bowl of baked rice cost 3 dollars..this lil bear cost 100 dollars..this tiny bowl of curry cost 5 dollars. this plate of tasteless plain rice cost 2 dollars. this lil cup of ergh-y oreo pulp was 3 dollars

All we wanted to do was spend evrything as fast as we could and leave that place. I almost died of a head and sweat pore explosion. Oh yea and did i mention?..it was darn stuffy and hot too.

Tests all ova again. There's alwayz a test evry week. The tchers unfortunately are cruel and u can just imagine their lil snickers and evil cackles.

Unfortunately..there's also a x-country event on tues. Which is kinda fustratting for me. and yea why's that?!

Bcos if im not gona get top 20 or if i stop half way..im gona go like..arghy-hell-im-sad sorta upset thingy
and mr issac lim will be all..i told u to train. And itll juz make me sadder.

though i worked out and all..im not exactly hardworkin. But im glad. Im starting to see some muscles there on my calf like those track days

Its been sad these days. People around me are gettin depressed and sufferin more often.

wy was sufferin from severe depression like id neva seen her before...i mean..she even cried and fainted at home twice.
and another of my fren..who's isolating herself bcos she doesnt wana face the world anymore..and im afraid to remind her of her Os when i call her to comfort her.
Celeste was crying the other days too.
I was upset quite lately too..
and all of that started from since we got our O lvl results

Some of us have lightened up..some of us havent

i have actually. But i was mad at my family. Nobody bothered abt how i felt. Until Muji spoke to em in private and threatened that if they were to scream at me or beat me cos of my O results...she'd not continue to work. Its nt just only tht.

When she told me tht. I was pretty upset. Even an outsider..someone who'ss only been with me for 2 years could understand how i was feeling. Yet my parents who's been with me for 17 years could not. SO their sudden okay-ness to me was caused by an outsider and not becos of their sudden realization that they were hurtin me so much.

If they'd actually did wat they wanted to do that night b4 muji stopped them...i would have left home. I really would. I would run out of home. I totally would have. Id make em regret what they did. Id hate em for life. For not realizing what i was goin thru and pushin me to the brink of woteba-ness

till now..they still do not understand how much they've hurt me. They've hurt me more than anyone else in the world and they still do not know. I wish i could yell at em now. Make them regret what they did. but i guess evrything's fine now. Thanks to Muji. And i shd learn to be forgiving